What's Your Why?

Now you have the vehicle, what next? Well, now it is time to put fuel in your vehicle to get it moving! What am I talking about by saying fuel for the ride? This is your motivation; or what we refer to as your why. Why are you doing this business? Remember designing your dream lifestyle earlier? This is part of your why, but it might not be all your why. Your why should be so powerful and painful that it is the solution to changing your life. It becomes the fuel that motivates you to work an extra hour at night. It is the fuel that motivates you to make a few extra calls each day. Here is the bottom line, if your why is big enough the how will not matter. You will make it happen. Preferably, legally! LOL 

I want to go back to the dream lifestyle answers that I get often from the forty-something crowd and turn them into painful motivators. Nobody likes pain. Well, I take that back, there are some people that I believe love pain. To take it a step further I am going to place the pain on me so you can gain a better understanding of what I am saying here. First, let me share a little about me. My father left when I was a baby. The time I started the 4th grade was about the time my stepfather began to both physically and mentally abuse me. I was later adopted at 15. Divorced by 24 and bankrupt by the time I was 25. I am now 49 with two amazing children. I am successful, but the road to get here was filled with a lot of pain.

There are a lot of things I experienced as a child and young man I never want my two sons to face. The pain of thinking they could go through that motivates me to work hard, make the best decisions and to lead by example. This is what your why needs to do for you. Okay, so now that you have a brief glimpse into my life, I want to take the answers from the dream lifestyle activity to show you how to use them as a powerful and painful why motivator to fuel your ride to freedom.

• Cars that won’t break down – There is no perfect car, but there is a difference between getting on the road and something unexpected happens and getting on the road knowing something will happen. During my childhood, we had horrible cars, no cars, cars with no headlights, one that was missing a door and plenty of times we broke down and often times it was during rush hour traffic. I was embarrassed to be picked up from school. I remember these feelings and the pain. It does not take me long to realize I do not want my kids to experience the same. My pain and desire to help them avoid this pain becomes fuel for me to build my business.

• Money for a vacation – I am not sure I even heard the term “Family Vacation” until I was adopted, and my new family took us camping. We never went on vacation or had the money to go on vacation when I was a child. Many kids do not get to experience the fun of vacations now, but I wanted to make sure my family was able to enjoy time together making memories that will last for a lifetime.

​• College Funds – I can remember the first time I ever heard the term, “Money for College”, but I still did not know what college was at the time. When I was in the 3rd grade, I was hanging out under my mom and stepdad’s bed. Not sure why, but I often found myself there. They came in fighting about credit card debt and cashing in savings bonds that were to be used for my college fund. Apparently, my mom had run up some credit card debt and cashed in some savings bonds. I ended up getting athletic scholarships that would have continued to pay for college if I played. Fast forward 35 years and now I have two sons. One day when my oldest was in the 3rd grade, weird coincidence, he asked me and his mom if we have started a college fund for him. Wow, I immediately flashed back to where I was under the bed. The sad truth is that we had not made any provisions for either of our children to go to college. If they want to go to college, I want them to be able to go and experience all that it has to offer. I felt pain because I had failed to be proactive in starting college funds for both.

• Nice Home – Now I am not talking so much about the structure of the dwelling area as I am talking about the stability of the family occupying the dwelling. Until I was adopted, I didn’t know what home ownership meant. I lived in apartments, two rental houses and mobile homes up until that point. And I do not ever remember living somewhere more than two years before we had to move, often being evicted. There was not much stability. In fact, there were times when I would do homework with a candle and take cold showers because we had no electricity. I remember times when I ate peanut butter and crackers (back before someone was smart enough to just combine the two!) We would eat this for days until we were so sick all we would do is lay on the floor moaning. I remember one time quite well when my mom went driving and knocking on doors asking for someone to feed me breakfast. I was so hungry I thought I was dying. The pain was and is so vivid that I do not want my children to ever experience those feelings.

• Money to Live – I often hear people say that money is the root of all evil. Nothing is further from the truth. Think about this, if I give part of my money to feed the Children, Cancer Research Foundations, the Salvation Army, and other great causes, how is that evil? Now if I hoard my money and never use it to be a blessing to others then yes, I am showing a love of money and it has become the root of my evil. In fact, often people will misquote the Bible. They will say, “The Bible says money is the root of all evil.” When in fact, the Bible says, “For the love of money is the root of all evil.” There is a big difference between these two phrases.

I love the movie Wall Street, but I would disagree with the catch phrase, “Greed is good.” So yes, I want money to live and help change lives, but I do not want to live for money. When you think about your “Why” think about things that have caused you pain. The kind of pain you never want to experience again or have your kid’s experience. But make sure they earn what you give them. Teach them the value of a dollar, especially an earned dollar! Remember when your “WHY” is big enough the how will not matter! Your “Why” becomes the fuel that gets your vehicle moving. With no fuel your business will not move!

You want to see a man with a big enough WHY? Rent the movie with Will Smith, the Pursuit of Happyness. Chris Gardener had a big enough WHY. DO NOT skip this step. Write down some key elements of your why. NOT doing so may very well cost you everything. Think about things that cause you pain. No money in the bank, unable to help organizations dear to you. Will your kids go to college worry free? Just be open, honest, and real with yourself and do it now.